Inside Tech: Dan Pope

Posted by Karen on Jan 8, 2016 12:00:00 AM
Welcome to the first Inside Tech blog post of 2016. For this edition, our marketing team will attempt to write about something that they have no clue about. Standard.

So what can I teach you about technical support? If you guessed nothing then you would be correct, however, I am not likely to give you any credit for this as it was obvious; they literally just said that in the introduction above. Let’s begin.

3 things to do whilst on hold to tech support

3. Hang up

If you’re waiting forever for somebody to answer your call then I seriously question your attitude towards work. I mean, come on, do you not have anything better to do than listen to awful tunes that wouldn’t be caught dead in a hotel elevator? Just hang up already, it's over.

This is why at Fluidata we keep you waiting for an average of 6 seconds before we answer – and we only really make you wait this long because it would be totally awkward if we picked up straight away.

2. Have a party

Hang on (hehe), what if the hold music is really good? What if you actually enjoy listening to it?

Fluidata’s Tron hold music is so classy that I often find myself calling up tech support on the weekends just so that I can be put on hold and take in the vibes. Inevitably, once I turn up the volume, an impromptu party starts to develop in my front room.

What’s more is that as the number is local, my friends and I can enjoy a great night of tunes at a value that is threatening to put Spotify out of business.

1. Fall in love

If you’ve ever seen the movie “Her” then you’ll know that it’s entirely possible to fall in love with a computer program. In this particular film, rapper-turned-actor Joaquin Phoenix falls in love with his PC operating system. It is not entirely inconceivable then that you might fall in love with a virtual receptionist, right? Stick with me as it’s about to get real.

If you’ve ever experienced an IVR then you’ll know that they are all questions and no answers. But all those questions, how do they make you feel? Special? Maybe even… loved? The truly attractive virtual receptionists lure you into Inception-like menus within menus (within menus) that leave you with no way out but to go deeper and deeper until you’ve no idea where you started or what you were even looking for in the beginning. All you really know is that you can’t hang up as you just want to see where this thing, whatever it is, will end up - and if that isn't love then I don't know what is.

Unfortunately, Fluidata doesn’t have such a winning selling point. It’s just one menu and you’re through to a person – boring!

That's it from Dan! Tune in soon for more pearls of wisdom from the technical support team (or whichever department wants to write something).

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